


"I'm about that life"

by fulltimeintrnthomo



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Drabble, Gaming Channel, Gen, References to Withdrawal, Relapse, Self-Harm, based on dan's comment in i am bread, i think you know which one i mean, references to that week in march
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-03 21:21:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14577921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fulltimeintrnthomo/pseuds/fulltimeintrnthomo
Summary: "You're gonna cut yourself!" Phil said."Good. I'm about that life," Dan replied.





	"I'm about that life"

Dan had just started his turn at playing I Am Bread, and he had moved onto the knife. "This is me trying to get out of bed in the morning. Let me free! Just dive onto the knife!"

Phil pointed at the computer screen. "You're gonna cut yourself!" he said.

"Good. I'm about that life," Dan replied.

Phil frowned and reached over to turn off the camera and microphone. He looked Dan in the eye. "Dan," he said. Dan paused the game, avoiding Phil's eyes. "Dan, look at me." Dan slowly looked at Phil. "Are you cutting again?" he asked.

Dan shook his head. "No. No, I'm not."

Phil frowned. "Roll up your sleeves."

"What? No! You should trust me!" Dan exclaimed, offended a little.

"Roll them up." Phil crossed his arms and Dan knew there was no getting out of it. He rolled up his sleeves so that Phil could see the red marks that littered his skin.

Phil gasped. Dan quickly rolled down his sleeves again. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I started self-harming again."

Phil's face softened. "It's not okay, but recovery from anything has relapses in it. But Dan...are you sure going off medication is what's best for you right now?"

Dan shook his head. "No, but you remember what happened in March. I went through withdrawal, which means, at the current moment, I'm dependent on the drugs. I don't want to go through withdrawal again."

"Okay," Phil said quietly. He put a hand on Dan's knee. "It's your decision. I can only imagine what it was like for you that week. I know it must have been one of the worst weeks of your life."

Dan nodded. "It was." He frowned, not wanting to remember that week. "Can we get back to filming?"

Phil nodded. "Of course. But we are continuing this conversation later."

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired so I wrote this!


End file.
